Tuesday, 8 September 2015

Hello, friend

It comes out of the blue, like a change in weather. After months of sun and hotness that made me sweat like Donald Trump surrounded by Mexicans the sky is dark; heavy rain weighs down the atmosphere, and with it, everyone's mood.
Gone is the aura of positivity and "I-don't-do-negative-emotions-because-they're-a-waste-of-energy". Gone is the progress of trying to be a better person.
Enter suicidal thoughts, over-eating, reliance on alcohol, inability to concentrate, the difficulty to understanding your emotions because you feel like there's a heavy suffocating blanket on your mind, enter the difficulty of getting up or remembering to shower or to take pills or to pretend to be pleasant so people would leave you alone. Enter light sensitivity. Enter wanting to get back with your ex so he could finally kill you. Enter over-dramatization. Enter the obsession with sharp objects: butter knives, bread knives, meat cleavers, razors, scissors, the rim of the can of olives I just opened, letter openers and edges of paper.

Enter my good old friend.

Hello, friend.

It's been a while.


  1. 'Enter wanting to get back with your ex so he could finally kill you' - yes yes yes

  2. If the man wanted the boy dead, the man would've killed him a long time ago. The man doesn't need "getting back" in order to accomplish such deeds. Also the man doesn't have weird fetishes like demonizing the man and making him the perfect antagonist to this boy's already tortured soul that is barely hanging in this cruel cold world the boy is destined to roam alone, depressed and unloved.